lesson learned

20 Apr

Well it’s a good thing Jane decided to let me continue to write because just as quick as the relationship with The Beau started, it ended (See A Lesson in Letting Go).

I know you wanted to know how we met, but in lieu of how the situation has panned out I will just tell you the short and sweet version:

We met through a coworker actually,  last summer. But as timing would have it, we didn’t go out on a date until a few months ago. And he and I clicking was SO unexpected.

So I did what most do (at least I know girls do this)…we assign meaning to every. little. event. that brought us into the relationship…and then angels and birds sing and by golly he MUST be THE ONE!

Why do we do this? It totally clouds any sort of logic and reasoning. And we ignore these HUGE warnings signs that are staring us right in the face. In fact they aren’t just staring, they are waving, poking, writing letters. STUPID fate. STUPID birds. STUPID girl. STUPID boy.

And just like that it’s over. Through e-mail.

Ah yes, e-mail. Isn’t technology and dating wonderful? Now people can cowardly hide behind a screen and type words. And you can say things you can’t say while looking at someone in the eyes. It’s easy to completely toss away and disregard someone’s feelings when you are typing it to a machine.

But people are not machines. We have feelings. The Beau clearly does not have feelings…at least for me any way. “We are on different wavelengths and things were moving too fast”, he writes. Total bullshit. Don’t BS a BSer.

Maybe if he had ever had a real conversation with me, he would have known I felt the same way.

So I am back in (on?) the saddle. I signed back on to plentyoffish.com. Which in reality should be called plentyofdouchebags.com. I quickly realize why I got off that site to begin with when I get a message from a guy who in one of his pictures is wearing a shirt that reads “Ass. The Other Vagina”. REALLY?

On a positive note…I was at my favorite coffee shop the other day which I have gone to for YEARS and have never met anyone. But this time, I totally got asked out by this hunky older Latin man. VERY bueno! 🙂 But as I just learned, no assigned meaning. Going to meet him for coffee and see where it goes. No wedding bells.

Just yet any way! 😉

Take away lessons:

1. If you have to talk yourself into someone, he isn’t the one.

2. If he talks like a jerk, walks like a jerk and quacks like a jerk…he is a jerk.

3. PAY ATTENTION to red flags! Don’t just brush them off or think that later on you can change that annoying/illegal habit he has.

It’s good to be back,
Gretchen

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7 Responses to “lesson learned”

  1. Amy K April 21, 2011 at 11:13 pm #

    Ugh- the dreaded “red flags”. Why are they so much easier to see AFTER the fact?! Sorry it didn’t work out, but it sounds like it was for the best.

    Chin up, and watch out for the douche bags. Looking forward to some fun dating stories, though. 🙂

  2. maridublado April 21, 2011 at 9:20 pm #

    Ladies,

    I have read your entire blog. It’s my self care time. 🙂 You all are hilarious and witty. And Gretch, I’m so sorry that The Beau didn’t work out, but he doesn’t know what he’s missing.

    Love,
    Mari

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Ironman « Boner in the Back - May 4, 2011

    […] is the older, hunky Latin man I talked about meeting in my favorite coffee shop in my Lesson Learned […]

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